Why Confidence is the Key During Transitions

By Lisa Berquist, Founder and President, Embrace the Leader Within and CWCC Member

Our entire life is a transition.  We go from birth, to childhood, to adolescence, to adulthood.  So why do we think that once we reach adulthood we would be done with change?  As we all know, change is constant and either we learn to manage change, or it will manage us.

When faced with change, are you filled with excitement and the strong impulse to rise to the occasion, or does your stomach sink, striking you with a sense of exhaustion and mild panic.  If you’re like most people, you may feel some combination of the two.

Confidence is the key ingredient to dealing successfully with change.

It’s all too easy to overlook the wonderful things about ourselves when the world is constantly pointing out the things that are not. It’s important for us to be in charge of our own ‘confidence bank account’ and to make many deposits so we do not become overdrawn when the world makes withdraws.  Additionally, we must not to rob ourselves with negative self-talk, but overflow our confidence bank account with positive thoughts about who we are and what we are capable of.

Here are some tips that can help keep your confidence bank account full:

#1 – Be aware of your successes.

Keep track of your successes. Literally write them down on a log or in a journal.  Keep a record of all successes, both great and small.  By writing them down you can review them.  This way when self-doubt sneaks in to your mind, you can review your successes and re-frame your current challenges in a more positive light.

#2 – Be aware of your abilities.

What are the skills you’ve gained through training and experience?  Keep an “I’m good at” list as a reminder of what you are capable of on those days when you feel like nothing is going right.  We can feel insecure about our self-worth when we give too much attention to our flaws. So change what you are looking at by reminding yourself of the skills and abilities you possess.

#3 – Be aware of your talents.

What are your natural talents?  Talents, which are innate, are different than abilities, which are learned.  The next time you feel a lack of confidence, remind yourself of the talents you naturally possess.  Talents don’t come and go; they are with you all the time.  You have every reason in the world to remain confident knowing that you always have talents that can be accessed and used when you need them.

#4 – Be aware of the compliments others give you.

Truly listen for the compliments given to you by others.  Compliments reveal the value that others see in us.  When you hear yourself saying, “I don’t have what it takes”, or “I never do anything right” stop listening to that voice and replace those thoughts by remembering the compliments others have given you.  We may sometimes make withdraws from our own account, but positive thinking can overcome any negative thinking that may have been robbing us.

Conclusion?  We need to learn to be positive. By being aware of the thoughts, words and actions that shake us, we can take change withdraws from our confidence bank account into deposits that bring us abundance.

Lisa Berquist is a leadership development coach who specializes in working with business leaders to deliver on the triple bottom line – purpose, people and profits.  She is the founder and president of Embrace The Leader Within, LLC., a leadership company dedicated to guiding technical managers to become inspired leaders who lead from the inside out.  Lisa believes that impactful leaders are those who know themselves well and understand their purpose for their work, while recognizing that people are the bridge between individual impact and company profits.